It’s just before 10pm and instead of going to sleep I’ve decided to write a blog post – totally NOT wise considering the amount Noah is waking up during the night at the moment and how early our days are beginning to start but AH WELL, I will just pay the price tomorrow.
So, Andy has gone back to sea again and I’m finding it tough. I don’t even know why because he has literally been gone for 3 days but it feels like 3 months! I’m not sure if it’s because he hasn’t been away since November last year (wow – I can say that now!) or just because I am super tired and sleep deprived but the days just seem REALLY long. I find myself willing for this time apart to me over but at the same time hating myself for feeling that way because it’s not good to wish away time (after all we don’t get enough of it).Now that Noah is crawling he is into everything and wants to be everywhere all at once. I have to have eyes on every limb because if I don’t then he is either pulling out a plug, pushing candles off the TV cabinet, out of the door or (his new trick) putting dog food in his mouth. IT. IS. EXHAUSTING! I don’t know if this is just because he is a boy … or if it’s just because he is my son… or if every child, no matter gender or parent is the same…BUT… oh my days when there is just one of you to follow him around all day, it can get quite tough. My mum always used to say to us as young girls “I’m not an octopus” and I used to wonder what she meant but now I know…now I wish I was an octopus…but one with as many eyes as a spider – yes I wouldn’t be that aesthetically pleasing but atleast I would be able to contain my nearly 1 year old son!
I have however found a solution to the problem I am having – any type of soft play/play cafe/playgroup/library rhyme time/baby class/play dates….just ANYTHING that will get us out of the house, Noah away from danger and me a bit of rest bite from having a heart attack each time the room goes silent. Seriously, if you are a new mum make sure you get to know the local mum hang outs or good places to go for children to let off steam because when you just need to give your brain a break they will be a saving grace! Noah and I even went to soft play the other day and had the entire place to ourselves – it was bliss – school pick up time, who knew?!
Anyway, I have made a pact to myself…not to wish time away despite missing my better half and embrace every day, no matter how tired it leaves me at the end of it. Carpe Diem and all that jazz. Let’s see how that goes.
For now, I will leave you with this lovely thought:
Be an enthusiast in life. If you are interested in something, no matter what it is, go at it full speed. Embrace it with both arms, hug it, love it and above all become passionate about it. Lukewarm is no good.
x A x